GMing, Adventures and Burnout
I got into GMing RPGs because I wanted to birth my own creations. I devised pantheons, drew maps, created factions and populated cities. There are lost RTF files full of histories and worldbuilding. I took so much joy in it. I was against pre-written adventures. Why use these when the thrill of GMing is all this creation.
My GMing path began with Dungeons & Dragons 3rd and 3.5 edition. I started with a long campaign set in a world of my creation, Mielu, but ended up burning out before finishing it. I came back to that world after 1 year in the real world and 100 years in Mielu. Another big effort of 50 or more sessions and I burnt out. Mielu shows up a final time when Dungeons & Dragons unveils it's 4th edition. I was a big proponent of the new edition to my gaming group and led the way into another campaign—and bonus spinoff 2 player campaign—that fizzled out.
During all of this D&D playing, I was reading a bunch of indie RPGs as I was often dissatisfied with my games and the burnout. This big chunk of D&D gaming ended with an explosion of smaller indie RPG play before entering a 3-5 year gap. Running D&D had become extremely stressful. I dreaded sessions, I was in a state of anxiety that my stories and world weren't delivering for my players. Eventually this resulted in barriers to creation and burnout.
I got back into RPGs with Dungeons & Dragons 5th edition. During this period I ran three homebrewed campaigns in new worlds. These consisted of two 100+ sessions campaigns for one group and a 40 session campaign run with a different group. This period spanned 8 years. And all three ended in me burning out and just kind of fading.
Five massive D&D campaigns, fully homebrewed and devised by me. Five fizzles. I'm a meteor shower of a GM, flashes in the sky. I had developed a lot more self-confidence by this point but I still struggled with making a narrative or adventure framework that felt up to my standards.
Here's where I decide to try something totally new. In 2022 I begin running pre-written adventures and it's been a total success. I've run or am currently running 13 adventure modules, from one-shots to multi-year beasts. My worst experience, running Lost Mine of Phandelver, is still more enjoyable than the stress and fear of those homebrew campaigns. Being annoyed at the writing and structure of Lost Mine of Phandelver is outward focused. When the little anxiety bird takes wing from within my own ribs, so close to my heart, it hits harder.
That's not to say that I'm not self-critiquing. Running pre-written adventures gave me the tools and perspective to finally do so effectively. My problem is the stories I want to tell, the narratives I want to live in, the characters I want to explore are fundamentally different than the majority of RPG adventure fantasy and fantasy roleplay. My ideal narrative is still that of the novel. Slower, internal stories, with big ideas, and interesting worlds. These are harder to do in the traditional fantasy roleplay space. I tended to drive my prep into these directions and struggle to make the round peg fit this square hole to my building frustration. There's a lot of wasted or poorly directed preparation.
The other side of the coin is when I'm given the guidance of a standard adventure fantasy, I can be taken along for the ride. I adore this. Being creative in how I use the pieces that are provided by the adventure; getting to interpret the NPCs and how the world interacts. The bounded space inspires instead of overwhelms. It's delightful.
I can also analyze the adventure. Take it apart and see how the words on the page interact with the reality of the table. I love this experience.
When I homebrewed everything I ran one campaign, continuously struggling with stress. With pre-written adventures, I have on several occasions run 3 concurrent campaigns with complete joy.
Try something different. Adventures are the game, even if they aren't the only version of that game.